Wednesday, September 22, 2004

I Must Confess...

I did it. I'm not proud, but I did it. I cheated on my hairdresser.

I was having a bad day in general and also hair-wise. I left for lunch, which included the obligatory bad-day-Lamar's donut. Right next to Lamar's was the salon. A crazy thought struck me: Just walk in...just do one has to know...

No. I pushed the thought away. I have to eat lunch and get back to work. But the thought lingered. I went away and ate my lunch. Then in a moment of weakness, I went back. I walked through the doors and was greeted with warm smiles. Certainly they could fit me in. Have a seat. Want a magazine? How about a beverage? Ahhhhhh.

Do I have regrets? Unfortunately no. The smell of my hairdresser-mistress P.'s shampoo was intoxicating. Her tools and techniques were new and exciting. I found myself smiling with satisfaction.

As I drove back to work, the consequences of my actions hit me. Oh no! What if K. (my regular hairdresser) sees me? She will know immediately that I've strayed. I've cheated! This dilemna is compounded by the fact that K. is not only my hairdresser, but also a good friend and a somewhat of a business partner for my jewelry business. She is leaving for an out-of-the-country trip. Could I avoid her until she came back? Could I pretend that the new hairstyle was my doing? Surely not. She would never buy that. She'd seen my hacker's work with the scissors before.

What if I was tempted to go back? Surely this was a one time thing...meaningless. But damn, the hairstyle was good. And the next day I was able to replicate it. Somewhat. I can never do that with K.'s cut. Oh, the guilt... Is vanity worth the price? Hmmmm....hell yes!

Thursday, September 16, 2004

Obsessive/Compulsive Eating 101

I signed up for a "Eat Well, Cook Less" class at the library a few weeks ago. I arrived early, so I had time to browse a bit before the class. Since I was going to a food-related class, I was hungry, so I ended up in the food/cooking/recipe section of the stacks. There I found a neat book called Top Secret Restaurant Recipes by Todd Wilbur. This author of this book has dissected popular dishes at several popular chain restaurants and provided recipes for them. What originally caught my eye was a recipe for the stuffed mushrooms at Houlihan's, which I have loved for years. I can make these at home now? Very cool.

I sat through my class, which was very good, and learned about how to make home-made granola, how to read nutrition labels and pick the healthiest ingredients, etc. Actually a very good class, but I was itching to get home and look at the "Top Secret" book some more.

When I looked closer, I found a recipe for Chi Chi's Fried Ice Cream. My husband and I absolutely LOVE fried ice cream. We also always thought it was actually fried. Not so! The bottom tortilla that the ice cream sits on is fried, but the actual ball of ice cream is simply rolled in crushed Corn Flakes, cinnamon and sugar. Well, there pretty much have the recipe too.

As an aside, the Chi Chi's restaurant chain was named after the founder's wife. Chi Chi was her nickname, which is also a slang term in Spanish's just say hooters. Makes you think twice about taking the fam to Chi Chi's now, doesn't it?

Anyway, the following day I stopped by the store, bought the ingredients and made fried ice cream for dessert. Yummy! So yummy that the following night, I made fried ice cream again. And again on the night following that, too. We were in fried ice cream heaven.

The next night, my husband cried "Uncle", but I was on a roll. Fried ice cream for one, please. This stuff was kick-ass good! The next night we both took a break...I think we went out to eat or something.

The following night, I was short on time, so skipped the rolling of the ice cream ball in the Corn Flake mixture and simply fried the bottom tortilla, sprinkled with cinnamon-sugar and put a naked ball of ice cream on top. I was pretty proud of myself. I shaved a few minutes off the prep time and still maintained the gist of the dessert. Still yummy!

After about 7 nights in a row, the newness wore off. The obsession was done. But those Corn Flakes are still in my pantry. They will call to me one day soon. And I will answer.

Thongs are a Pain in the Rear

Let's just get this out of the way first. I'm a girl. I hate to shop. Hate it. H-A-T-E. Hate is not even a strong enough word for how I feel when I walk into a mall, knowing that I need to buy something before leaving.

My husband, on the other hand, loves to shop. Loves it. Lives for it. He's a clothes horse of the highest breed. During college, he worked at several men's clothing stores, and I'm not talkin' The Gap, I'm talkin' stores where the shoes are 400 bucks. So when it comes to clothes, he's got very high standards and knows what he's doing.

So, he decides that he's had it with my pilled Kohl's trousers and my four-year old Steinmart blouses and my Payless shoes. He offers to take me to lunch and shopping on the Friday before July 4th. Shopping? On a day off? Grrr... What sealed the deal is that he offered to take me to lunch (I'm so easily bribable with food) and then, if I still felt okay with it, we would shop. He would hold my hand, offer advice and basically help me get through it. Sounds like tight-rope walking, right?

So, the Friday came. We ate lunch. I couldn't muster up an excuse, so shopping we went.

The first store was The Limited. He was determined to get me into those trendy blank tight-ish pants that basically ever woman in North America owns but me. Funny when you think about it...most guys want to get into your pants, not get you into pants. But I digress...

So I try on these crazy pants...and I like them. And they don't look half bad. And (this is way cool) I wear a size smaller than what I thought. I like this place! I remember thinking.

Here's the rub...these pants don't quite get along with my underwear. I don't wear Granny-panties, I wear fairly standard french-cut underwear, but these pants are having none of that. They demand a THONG! Oh man...

So he drags me down to Victoria's Secret, which I discovered later, is suspiciously owned by the same company as The Limited. Hmmm...I smell a conspiracy. I look at all the thongs. Good God - how many types/colors/styles can there be? I select a pair and guess at the size, since I didn't know if it was social acceptable to try on underwear or not.

The following Monday, I excitedly got ready for work and put my new outfit on, thong included. It's not too bad, I remember thinking. Much more comfortable than the thongs I'd had run-ins with in the past. Then I walked down the stairs to get some coffee. Ouch! It kind of pinched. I stood in front of our hall mirror, stuck my hands down my pants and adjusted things. Then checked out my ass. No panty lines. Cool! I walked in to get coffee. Grr... Something was not where it was supposed to be. Actually, let me correct that. Something was where it was not supposed to be. I had a gigantic swatch of cloth between my butt cheeks! What an annoying feeling! Did I buy the wrong size? How do women wear these things? What sacrifices are necessary to be panty-line free? Is this all worth it? Arg!

I calmed myself down and got some coffee. I went to work.

Sometime during the day I realized that I'd forgotten about the self-inflicted wedgie in my nether-region! I could do it. I could wear a thong and be fashionable. Of course, when I got home that night, I immediately took the damn thing off and threw it across the room. And it felt wonderful.

Supermodel I'm not, but I've at last made peace with the dreaded thong.