Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Goofy Glows in the Dark?

Soon, I will glow in the dark. I've been x-rayed so many, many times, and more to come. WTF you say? Let me explain....

First there was the back pain*. Complete with follow-up x-ray to determine progress (not much, if you're curious).

Then there was the Big 4-0 Celebratory Mammogram (but yet... no parade with streamers. sigh.) Squish and x-ray both boobs.

Then the scary "You Didn't Get Mail, You got the Scary Phone Call" Follow-up Mammogram. Squish and x-ray that suspicious-looking right boobie only.

Then the "We Still Don't Like What We See, So Let's Operate" needle biopsy (aka THE DRILL). Followed up with (you guessed it, folks), more squishing and x-raying of that pesky right bazoomba. **

Then attention turned upward (Thank the heavens!) to my teeth. Annual dental exam last week. Need to x-ray those teeth. This time I got a spooky full-frontal x-ray. My eyes were in it! Well, not the eyes, because they don't show up, but the sockets. Ew! Very spooky to look at. But no cavities, ma!

Today I went to the doctor for The Cold That Started in March. It's still here and I'm pissed. Doc refused to give me antibiotics back in April (what, is there a shortage of these, like the gas?), so I got some crazy bronchitis thing. It's okay during the day, but at night, the chest congestion rolls in like low tide into the ocean. He put me on an inhaler (new experiences..yeah!) and ordered me up a chest x-ray. At least there's no squishing involved.

And, because I'm a glutton for punishment, I mentioned my back (see first item above). He poked me in the back and decided to order me up a back x-ray.

So sometime this week I get to have my chest and back x-rayed. In all seriousness, I will ask the technician about all this x-raying and it's affect on my health. I can't imagine I'll be able to sleep well with all the glowing in the dark and all.

* This was actually one of my better posts. If you got some time to burn, check it out. The rest of the links are there for show.
** Everything turned out negative (as in GOOD) from all this. And now I have a cool scar that I can't show anyone.


Cagey said...

Has Mr. Goofy sung "You Light up My Life", yet? :-)

Jane said...

Good heavens! I'm glad you're okay after all of that. And I hope you have good health insurance.

AWE said...

I think the x-rays at the dentist office are a scam. I have told them a couple of times that I couldn't afford it and they always find a way to do the work without it.